Stay
by Bethe
Summary: She doesn't mind sharing him. . .just as long as he stays.
1. Default Chapter

Stay

By Bethe

~*~

Author's Note: I've been listening to this song for the past few weeks, and a little songfic has slowly been evolving. I wasn't quite sure at the beginning how it would all work out, but I've got it down now. And I must say, I think it's quite original (at least, from what I've read so far). The setting is right after IOTH. And, that's all I'm going to give you. You have to read for the rest. ~~ Bethe

Disclaimer: I don't own any aspect of the Pretender (it's quite obvious what I would do if I did). Neither do I own the song "Stay" by Coal.

~*~

Wrapped in a heavy blanket, Zoe stared blankly into the roaring fireplace. She had given up staring at the phone a month ago. The only calls she received nowadays were from the Major, asking if she had heard anything from his son. Her reply was always in the negative. 

Christmas had come and gone, with no word from Jarod. She would argue that it was for her own safety, but a small part of her knew that wasn't true. He would have at least sent word through some sort of courier if that were the case. 

She wrapped the blanket tighter around her and closed her eyes. The more likely explanation had to do with _her_: the Parker woman. He loved her. Zoe didn't know if he knew it or not, but she did. Sometimes, while he was sleeping, he would call out her name. Sometimes the name was said with fear, sometimes with tenderness. And other times, it was accompanied by a soft moan. Those nights were completely devoid of nightmares for him. Miss Parker kept away the bad dreams. . .something Zoe could never do.

Almost as if thinking about him was the catalyst, the door opened and Jarod walked in. Snow clung to his hair and coat, and there was a fresh wound on his temple. He offered a crooked grin, but it didn't reach his eyes. He closed the door behind him and raised his hand.

"Hi," he whispered. 

Zoe stood up and nodded a greeting. She hesitated for a moment while tears filled her eyes. Only when one slid down her cheek, did she run into his arms.

----------

__

You don't have to lie about where you've been.

  
We both know you've been screamin'.

  
So why don't you give your little voice a rest, 

climb on up inside my bed, 

and just pretend you need me?

----------

Jarod started to offer some rambling excuse, but Zoe just placed a hand to his mouth. She already knew the truth; she could tell just by looking at him. But oddly, at that moment, she didn't care. He was with her, wasn't he? He could at least pretend that he loved her.

----------

__

You don't have to lie about what you know.

  
We both know you've been sufferin'.

  
And I don't need to be your only one, 

  
and I don't need your comfortin', 

  
I just need you with me.

----------

It was then and there that Zoe realized she didn't mind sharing him, just as long as he was with her. She looked in his eyes before gently kissing his lips. She felt his arms move around her, more out of habit than a need to hold her. But she didn't care.

----------

__

Stay, stay, stay with me.

  
Stay, stay with me. 

  
Stay, and don't you ever run away from me.

Stay, stay with me.

----------

Zoe just wanted him to stay. And she knew he would. For now, at least. He kissed like a man who had lost his love, and was now trying to replace her with the next best substitute. While the thought that she would always play second-string to the Parker woman hurt, Jarod was with her at the moment.

----------

  
_Oh, and if she ever let's you down,_

  
after she's run out of your money,

  
Well then just crawl on back to me.

I'm the one that sets you free, 

and I'm the one that needs you.

----------

From what she had gathered through various reports, Miss Parker was one tough woman. And while she may feel something for Jarod, she would never let it show. Parker would only equal heartbreak for Jarod, and Zoe would be the one he would crawl back to in the end.

----------

__

And if she ever let's you go, 

  
we both know what you'll be needin'. 

  
And if you need somewhere to rest, 

  
somewhere to lay your head, 

you'll know where to find me.

----------

She would always be the rebound girl. Despite the fact that she would never break Jarod's heart, she would never be good enough for first choice. She could already feel it in his embrace, in his kiss. He was looking for catharsis. He was searching for verification that the fire was definitely too hot, but he kept going back to be burned.

----------

__

Stay with me!

Stay with, stay with me.

Stay with, stay with me.

Stay with me.

  
I can't live another day, 

  
I won't live another day without you, baby!

  
Stay with me!

Stay with me

.

Stay with me.

Stay with me.

Stay with me.

----------

Jarod picked her up, again out of habit, and carried her into the bedroom. Zoe could feel the need, the longing, for any kind of love he could get at the moment. And she wouldn't deny him it. She would give him what the Parker woman would not: her whole self. Just as long as he stayed with her.

----------

__

Turn down the headlights.

Empty the ashtrays.

Sweep out of the airway what's left of our time.

Well, you can use my body

To do what you have to.

But stay a little longer,

Stay with me.

----------

After it was over, and Jarod was asleep in her arms, Zoe stayed awake. She could already feel him in the throes of another dream, and she knew who it was about. He cried openly and called out _her_ name, begging _her_ to reconsider. Zoe cried too, for what she had become.

All because she loved a man named Jarod.

~*~

El Fin


	2. Argument

Argument

9-2-03

Those of you who know me well might be wondering why on earth I would write such a blasphemous fic as "Stay?" Well, it's quite simple, actually. Zoe's story needed to be told fairly. I can't even begin to count the number of fics I've read where Zoe has a temperament to rival Miss Parker's, or Zoe is just the ditz girlfriend. Most times, she's simply explained away with no questions asked. And I also don't even want to attempt to estimate the number of chats that I've been a part of where the unanimous proclamation is that Zoe is evil, or that they hate her. I, for one, do not share that opinion. 

First off, Zoe is a character of the show, just like Raines, Lyle, and other despicable examples. Yet, I've seen fics that portray those monstrosities in a fairer light than Zoe. It seems to me that Zoe's only crime was falling for Jarod. Now, while I am a hardcore shipper, I do believe that Zoe and Jarod's relationship served a purpose. Zoe helped him taste life, and experience it to the full. She gave him a part of her childhood. That's something Miss Parker could never do, for she never had a normal childhood, either. 

I also believe that Zoe has definitely been unfairly portrayed in past fics. As I stated earlier, she is often painted as a bitch (pardon my language. I don't normally speak this way, but it seems to be the only word that works at the moment). Other times, she's giggly and kooky. And then, she just disappears. One convenient explanation via an acquaintance of Jarod, and we move on without question to the JMPR that will inevitably come. I feel this is wrong. Her side is rarely (more like never) shown with true respect to that character. So, "Stay" was born.

So far, I believe that I have received only one review that was worth the effort put into this fic, and that was by Mickey. Now, by the time this note goes up, it's possible I might have more. But the reviews I found in my email moments ago shoot down that hope. A word to potential reviewers: if all you can say is "I hate Zoe. . .but good fic," or, "Jarod loves Parker, Jarod loves Parker. . .Whoo Hoo!", please express more than that. As a writer, I would love to hear why you hate Zoe, but also why you loved the fic. Or, at least make the review relevant to the fic's meaning. This fic was _not_ about Jarod and Miss Parker's relationship. Let me repeat that: This fic was _not_ about Jarod and Miss Parker's relationship. And, I guess one could say that it wasn't about Zoe and Jarod, either. It's about Zoe, most of all. 

Now, if I've hurt some feelings, well. . .then I guess I've done my job. While writing this, I was hoping to stir up some kind of emotion in you, the reader, whether it be intense hatred for Zoe, or an urge to flame me, or a new understanding for Zoe's position. Well, if you must flame, then flame on. But please, do it intelligently.

And now, friends (although, there might be less of you than I started with at the beginning of this note), as I close, I urge you to read the story one more time with an open mind. Maybe, you can see it for what it really is.

~~Bethe


End file.
